vanhelga, in her work as a curator for the museum of modem civilization, has discovered what appears to be an early html depiction of an urban scene. this primitive piece of net.art shows a young mother about to be flattened by a stray window that has come loose from an evil-looking red skyscraper as her little daughter stands there all purple and innocent. v.h. has secured for mutaGenesis exclusive rights to the premier exhibit of this historic piece right here in our galleries. because she's stern and influential. not because she sleeps around for favors. so enjoy.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Wednesday, August 29
we've been getting entirely too many hits from porn-related searches. that's why from now on, we're devoting the site to promoting real estate sales in the idyllic hastings, mn area.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Thursday, August 23
happy birthday, blogger! you bloated, leaky darling, you.
triple-d's friend mingmingcherry has an exquisite new piece on her site that's sure to have you swinging from the trees. if you can somehow manage to be listening to joy division's 'transmission' when you see it, you will have your mind blown much as mine just was.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Wednesday, August 22
then once in a while we really do something good, to make up for all our vandalism, trespassing, and general snotnosed attitudes. we give something back to the community. maybe it was yesterday's nipple thing, or all the feminism that's been wafting around the office lately like fine, 5-dollar chilean wine, but BeSsIe put aside her love of farm animals [insert witticism here] and did a piece for all the wimmin out there.
in the first of a series of banner ads for betties, called banner exchange, BeSsIe gives us "if."
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Tuesday, August 21
the day has finally come. break out the champagne and fire up the stogies. better than critical acclaim, soaring IPOs, or shiny new weed wackers, mutaGenesis.org made the top of an aol search for mexican girls nipples.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Monday, August 20
well, digdeeperdown almost lost badweatherfriend's home page, probably because she's so gay, which we now have proof of, 59% proof anyway, but she managed to find it and so we now, after much delay and not a little ass-biting, give to you, our dear readers, both of you, bad's review of le tigre at the congress theater. mrar, etc.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Friday, August 17
we're putting together a petition to remove words we dislike from the english language. candidates so far include "indubidable," "whoopass," and "participate." send nominations to ewenice@mutagenesis.org.
we're just crabby because we didn't get tix to bjork.
and because we're not kathleen hannah, the coolest girl at the party. hold your breath for badweatherfriend's review of last night's le tigre show. but only if you are a professionally trained stunt person. it'll be next week sometime.
meanwhile, consult the events calendar triple-d's been slaving over for all your weekend plans. it's equal parts can't-miss attractions and can't-stand-the-idea-of-attending activities. you decide which is which. we can't really.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Wednesday, August 15
guesses from monday's quiz are pouring in. these from a Li'l Miss Inuit Isporn, an associate predator at BPM manual village:
1) 8 Dildos a Whirring (I Love You) 2) 18 and Luscious 3) 88 Lesbians And 44 Wonders 4) 99.9 Freaky Deeds 5) 1 2 3 and a Zenana Zenana Zenana 6) 19th Nasty Babe 7) 50 Widows to Lick your Labia 8) 65 Lips Alickin 9) 99 Lithium (Rain) Bows 10) 6 t(itallating) h(ead) And How!
they're all wrong, of course, but they make up for that in depravity! miss isporn will go home with the official mutaGenesis basement genotyping kit and, hopefully, with me.
keep those entries comin'. we still have a weekend in Västerbotten (in the arctic circle!) and a 3.4-oz. bottle of eau de Jésus to give away.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Monday, August 13
take the MutaGenesis Equally Nerdy Smartypants Aptitute (MENSA) test to see if you're a genius or just a genus or even just a gnu. figure out what the letters mean. see the example.
1-3 correct: vanilla ice. you're no lyrical poet 4-6 correct: phil collins. you've got more soul patch than thinking cap 7-9 correct: bootsy collins. you've got the funk. ow 10 correct: call me. i love you
ready? O-K!
example: 2 G for every B 1) 8 D a W (ILY) 2) 18 and L 3) 88 L A 44 W 4) 99.9 F D 5) 1 2 3 and a Z Z Z 6) 19th N B 7) 50 W to L your L 8) 65 L A 9) 99 L (R) B 10) 6th A H
example: 2 Girls for every Boy
send guesses to mensa@mutagenesis.org for your chance to win authentic mutaGenesis merchandise!
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Friday, August 10
BeSsiE is back from a haitus in brazil where she attempted to pick up a bit of portuguese and a few poofers. neither attempt was all that successful, but she did manage to glean some inspiration from the countryside, especially its domesticated farm animals, and has begun hinting at a new series. having seen a preview, i can tell you this much: vengeance is back with a vengeance. evil is the new cute!
while you salivate over the prospect of her new crop of pixelated petting zoo poop pals, check out her new home page and dust off the cows.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Monday, August 6
one of us is going to have to learn portuguese in order to read all the cool blogs. seriously, you guys. one out of every five is in portuguese. the other four are by queer boys living in manhattan. of course i can't be certain, but this one may be both. muito bom! (which i think means 'check out my fanny!')
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Friday, August 3
so i met this girl in a bar last friday who said her name was chlamydia. we danced all night, and i matched her shot for shot. i woke up alone the next morning with the worst headache of my life, no memory, and this tattoo on my butt.
All the words on these pages are the soul property of mutagenesis.org. You will have to think of
some others to use. All writes wreserved.
Thursday, August 2
give me some water! (cuz i shot a man on the mexican border)
62 hours of classic rock and 10.5 litres of tequila later...we're back and ready to shop online. cuz we loooooooooooves us some internet. if the internet were playing a sold-out, outdoor concert in 108-degree weather on a wednesday afternoon, we'd stand in line for a chance to jump the fence and buy 10-dollar plastic cups of beer to pour down our fronts, so the singer for the internet could almost see our wet nipples. that's how much we love the internet.
so we're heading to shoebuy.com with a fistfull of plastic to complete our collection of campers.
vanhelga wishes it to be known that she wants nothing to do with this entire affair. :P